AN OPEN LETTER TO KEN

[Southron]

Ken:

You wrote the following to one of the members of this forum:

...the change in character at the Southron's in the last 6 months has been a little disheartening. They were a very good resource for me at first, but I'm afraid it's gotten to be filled with Uruguayans looking for business. I was told by another expat, that Finzer is actually auctioning off contacts and business relationships, promising access to the gringoes to Uruguayan "Friends" in exchange for a fee.

I am not going to beat around the bush here. The slander you repeated was a lie, you knew it was a lie because I addressed this many months ago directly, and yet you published it to a third party. As an attorney you should know better.

I would have had more respect for you if you had had the courage to make you calumny public. But, instead, you chose to slander me behind my back...

An even so, you have the temerity to still come to my house and eat and drink from my table and pretend that you are a friend!!!

For the record, we spend between $30,000 and $40,000 per year promoting Uruguay through our websites and we have not accepted ONE PENNY FROM ANYONE for doing so. A very long time ago we consider adding a commercial aspect to this project, and after consideration rejected it.

Anyone who says otherwise is not only a liar, but a damned liar.

Do not EVER come into to my house again. You are not welcome and will not be admitted. Further, unless you immediately and publicly retract your lies you will be banned from this forum forever! I do not plan to pay for you to stab me in the back and besmirch my integrity.

Very truly yours,
R David Finzer
The Southron

[Ken]

..

[Southron]

Dear David,

I am truely very sorry to have repeated that rumor to a "friend" in a private communication. I most certainly told that person that this was not first hand knowledge, but just something that I was told by another ex-pat. Nevertheless, I should not have repeated it, and I am very sorry for this .

The other aspect of the email about the forum was just my personal feelings and observations. I respect you and your efforts, and understand your harsh emotions in these circumstances.

Respectfully, Ken

I have seen the entire communication which was forwarded to me. You can spin this any way you want--but please spin it as far away from me and these websites, which I have thus far sponsored totally pro bono.

I am seriously considering canceling all of our websites and Open House programs and those who appreciate them will have you, and a few others like you, to thank for their cancellation.

Very truly,
DF

[Sara]

David, don't give up on this forum, which means so much to so many people. It has made a community out of a bunch of isolated individuals - we start friendships, we learn from each other, we help each other and yes, we occasionally quarrel with each other, too. It's a lively place.

Ken's malicious stories probably reflect just sheer jealousy over what you have accomplished in Uruguay in such a short time. Attributing his comments to "another expat" is the ultimate cop-out.

Please, don't lose heart, keep up the good work, and ignore the envy of lesser people.

With best regards,

Sara

[Deb]

David,
Keep on with what you're doing:
The thermometer of success is merely the jealousy of the malcontents.
This isn't the first time this has happened but I bet it's Ken's last time.
Ken,
I had a "friend" too when I arrived here. However, the "friend" was completely correct to tell David what you were saying.
You didn't know the friend's other friends, did you? Oops!
All friends:
Please find a way to occupy your damn time.

[spb]

David-

I don’t know anything about this specific indecent, so I won’t comment.

I hope the Forum remains in operation. Kick out those who offend; it’s your Forum!

However, there’s a long-term disturbing trend with the open house, and I’ve only been to a few. For instance, there’s the American with a rental in MVD who jokes, “Ha, Ha, the only reason I come here is to rent my place.” There’s another person with a web offering that eats your food and talks behind your back with the next breath. While I don’t know if he’s been to the open house, there’s a passive/aggressive South American from Boston who covertly attacks everyone with a smidgen of success on the web, including my modest work.

Why? I have no gut feeling for how people get here or an understanding of it, but rest assured jealousy and resentment are behind it. Do you have any idea that some people resent what you’ve done? You have the time, money and creativity to build something. The sad sacks that attack you, and me for god’s sake, have none of these resources except excess time.....and they dislike you for it.

It is a sad and natural progression for the open house. Perhaps it’s time for it to be an invitation/RSVP only event for friends and their friends. I know this strikes both of our egalitarian natures as elitist, but this may be the only way to continue them and end the abuse. I can assure you, the entitlement minded, those who have done little and expect a lot, don’t appreciate what you’re doing. The bigger question is, do we really want them in the community?

Steve Bowman

[Harry]

I have a modest suggestion for Southron's open house. (No, no, don't cook and eat the malcontents!) During one of the big celebrations earlier this year I asked a cousin in Montevideo to order a couple of cakes from Cakes to be sent to Southron's house. For some reason, Cakes was unable to find the house. I felt like doing that because of the enjoyment I've had reading this forum and felt like contributing somehow from far away. My suggestion: Make the open houses pot luck or at least ask for some contribution.

[Fuzzybill]

David -- I am not familiar with the personnel involved in this imbroglio, but I agree with Sara that your efforts with this Forum and the Sociedad are admirable. I cannot express adequately my appreciation for your efforts. As one who is examining the possibility of relocating to the ROU I find that virtually the only place I can 1) get information about that prospect, and 2) ask people who have made actually the move the multitude of questions I have about taking this step is on the Forum. Without the tools you have graciously provided, I would not have been able to learn nearly as much about the country, its people and life for an ex-pat there as I have. I have not had the privilege of attending a Thursday get together yet, as it was cancelled the first time I visited last March. My wife and I will be visiting in about 6 weeks and we are looking forward to meeting you at one of your open houses. Although I empathize with your reaction to what happened, I would ask that you take a long look at what you have accomplished and what your efforts have meant to us Forum members and to Uruguay itself before you take such drastic action. As I have noted, I look forward to meeting you when we come down this Spring and to learning even more from you and other Sociedad members. -- Rich

PS -- I bought your book shortly after it was published and it has been of immense help to me in my search for the right place to retire Thanks. -- RS

[Narcissus]

As an Uruguayan, i feel offended by Ken's comments.

I came to this forum to know a bit more about the minds of those foreigners who chose my country as their home. I´ve never seen it as a businness, or as an income source.
I´ve never tried in any way to make any profit from any american (or whatever their nationality) coming to Uruguay.
I have never been (and will never be) to any of your gatherings / luncheons / bbqs. If i was ever interested, be sure comments like these wiped any possible interest away.
I guess i would not feel comfortable imagining some of you are thinking i'm just there for the money.

I have even posted some topics at Ken´s forum. I never imagined he saw us as people interested in taking some economic advantage from the expats.
I should have imagined that having such an intense segregationist background as americans have, it must be hard to leave this way of thinking in the past, and see uruguayans as peers. Maybe for SOME (luckily just SOME) americans it's an impossible task.

If you want to keep this or any other forum as something exclusively "american" that´s fine. It´s a free country and so you're free to choose what kind of users you want to accept in your web space.

Just make sure you make it clear in the "rules" section, and then you will sure get rid of the uruguayan pest contaminating your forum.

Otherwise, you´ll have to tell good intentions from bad intentions and ban users with spurious and illegitimate interests. And those are independent from nationality, creed, skin colour or religion.

Cheers.

[gaberoo]

David,
I fully agree with Sara: the service you've provided to so many people is invaluable and all the more so because it's been done with no other intention than to help others and provide the much needed community from which to do so.